Today: begin. Tomorrow: carry on.

Write that story.
Sing that song.
Meet that goal.

Know "You can build success from previous failure or from previous success but you can’t build success by wishing for it." (x)
Realize that life in unpredictable and anything can happen.
Remember if you never quit, you can never lose.
Begin now the things you always said you'd do.

Today: begin. Tomorrow: carry on.


xo | Megan

currently loving

i. fresh air hinting of adventure & newness drifting in through my window every morning
ii. daily visits to the park
iii. laughter
iv. magical sunsets
v. morning lattes on the porch
vi. looking forward to a long road trip & two weeks in the sunshine state
vii. having ice cream every day
viii. messy buns, short sleeves, & flip flops
ix. good time with family & friends
x. making happy memories to last a lifetime

what are your current loves?
eve

i feel like i should post this here.

original photo

i only just recently got my life together, and this is the verse that God used to minister to me. i feel like lately, a lot of us have been going through some horrid times. and the best part is, when it's over, you breathe easy, and you know that with His help, you can do anything. so this is matthew 11:28, and i hope it speaks the you the way it spoke to me. i hope He holds you the way He held me. 

xx,

jocee.

holding it together

Amateurs are overconfident.
The professionals are scared to death.
-- quote via pinterest --

You know those people who always seem to have it together? It's as if their business/blog is coming along nicely & they always seem so confident. But guess what? They have the same doubts and worries as everyone else. They just manage to smile their way through the hard times, laugh away the awkward, & jump up after every fall. They keep pushing forward no matter what. They're the professionals.

If you're worried about starting upon a new venture, don't let fear hold you back.

Let overconfidence... because it's probably a sign that you're not ready yet.


hugs, eve

argh argh argh

I'm not exactly sure how to start this post.

(Don't worry, I'm not leaving too! Ha.)

I guess that's how I'll start it? Okay.

These past few weeks have left me more confused than I've ever been... my emotions have been played with, my self esteem keeps going up and up only to fall even lower, opportunities that I'm not 100% sure about keep popping up, I keep thinking I finally have it all together, only to get shaken up and drop everything once more.

I struggle so much with confidence. It's not that my own confidence is so important for me to have, but I think it's important to at least do what I'm doing without cowering every second. I'm always so scared of everything I'm doing (photography, writing, knitting, creating) that I feel like I shouldn't be doing it. But at the same time I KNOW THIS IS WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. And that's why it's confusing.

One day in particular last week left me not only worried and scared, but hurt and lonely. It started out great. But it didn't end great. People hear things they assume are true. They tell me things they don't necessarily mean, and I take them to heart, playing their words over and over in my head, deciphering them and applying them to my every move. I can't sleep, I doubt every ability I thought I had, I hate myself, I just feel so low. I feel like I can't actually do anything anymore - that I'm like a photographer with no hands, or a writer with no brain. YOU CAN'T DO IT my insides scream. IT WON'T WORK YOU LOSER I keep telling myself.

I'm not writing this to get sympathy or nice messages telling me it's going to be okay. Actually, I'm not sure why I'm writing this. I guess I just feel alone in the world. And as selfish as this sounds, I kind of hope other people out there feel low and have doubts like I do every now and then too... 

My life isn't bad. I have a good life, a very good life. But even though good things are happening right now, bad things are happening too...

My bad for not posting in like 9 months. My brain is too muddled to think of an excuse right now.

abby

the gift list

i am on the daily hunt for eucharisteo: 
thanksgiving, grace, joy.

my moleskine pages are full of an ongoing list of eucharisteo. the messy-gritty, the obvious beauty, the God-glory surrounding me in little brother's laugh, in the purple-flower plants, in the room covered in clothes waiting to be packed away.

it is soothing for my soul, to name these gifts, the everyday joy and pain. it has opened my eyes to the world, and i am searching, ever searching, for the little blessings that make of the bigger picture of what we call life. i notice more now, because i am constantly wanting to notice. i want to reach this dare of one thousand gifts, and now i see things i never noticed before, things i would never have counted as a gift.

1. morning light dancing on my sleepy face
3. sweet memories of camp hanging on my wall
11. melodies sung by nature
19. the fear and excitement of growing up
22. crooked smiles
29. cheap film cameras
34. bare feet on concrete floor
40. white fluff and soft pink and baby blue painted across the sky
68. melting chocolate on fingers

these are the gifts of the everyday that i have come to notice and cherish with these new eyes. every gift listed fills my heart full of joy and grace and thanksgiving- eucharisteo.
have you taken the dare to list one thousand gifts?
g.

go to the park

Maybe you're 12, or maybe you're 19, but you should still go to the park and play with your friends.

xo | M

something that broke my heart

We'd been walking up in the city that night, basking in the evening air that was almost summer. The cityscape soon melted into the section of town where the homeless congregate on the half-wooden-half-metal benches. It was the part of the city that made my stomach churn. There was always somebody with headphones stuck in their ears, singing at the top of their lungs. Or somebody walking the street, shouting at the world for all their troubles. Always a sad out of tune melody wafting into the cracks in the sidewalk. That day, there was a man and a woman standing on the sidewalk, talking. Homeless and broken. I watched him wrap his arms around her and say
"it's okay, it'll get better."

We walked past them with our expensive cameras and new shoes
I didn't even hear him. His words were repeated to me later.
But when I heard them, my heart slowly broke in two.

-M

maybe

“It is not our part to master all the tides of the world, but to do what is in us for the succour of those years wherein we are set, uprooting the evil in the fields that we know, so that those who live after may have clean earth to till. What weather they shall have is not ours to rule.” ― J.R.R. Tolkien

I sit and think sometimes,

of days gone by.

Of the countless people,

who lived before.

Some of them are remembered,

& some are to remain forever forgotten.

But they all lived & laughed & cried,

& they all left behind something.

A legacy,

which helped shape the world

for better or for worse.

No matter how little,

they all left one behind.

The world is what it is today

because of all these people

and all these faces,

most of whom I'll never know.

I sit and think sometimes,

of my legacy.

I don't need my name in history textbooks.

I just want my legacy to make a difference

in this world.

Maybe I can't control what weather

future generations will have.

But I want to make sure the soil I leave behind

is clean.

And maybe if more of us sat down and thought

about our legacies,

really cared.

Then maybe, just maybe,

the soil our generation leaves behind

will be fertile

instead of rocky.

Maybe.

xx, e

perfection

I am a perfectionist. I have been a perfectionist for a long, long time. I like my room to be spotless & clean, the pillows on my bed to be fluffed 'just so,' and the books on my shelf to be arranged according to height & author. Every time I walk past a front yard dotted with giant dandelions I get a sudden urge to go grab some gardening gloves. I have had germophobia ever since I read a science book when I was seven & I wash my hands all the time. I cannot imagine life without my daily planner at hand.

But here's the thing... I get frustrated sometimes. I get frustrated because sometimes things don't go according to plan. MY plan. Sometimes I focus too much on doing things perfectly & 'just so.' But life isn't like that. Sometimes getting dirty is not a choice. No matter how much I plan, something unexpected will always pop up.

The spontaneous things in life, I believe those are God's way of saying, "Hey, you're not in charge. You're not the one planning out your life. I am. Just trust me." Sometimes we get too caught up in ourselves that we forget who it is that's really in charge. We need to remember that God holds the reins, not us. That's not to say that we should just sit around because "Well, we're not in charge anyways so we'll just let our lives unfold & if God wants something to happen He can make it happen by Himself." Ummm... no. That's actually called laziness. We still need to work hard & do our very best at everything. BUT we need to remember that we can't achieve perfection. Not in this life.

We need to embrace the spontaneous & the dirty & the trials & the pain. God sent them for a reason. To shape, to teach, & to grow us so we can become who He made us to be.

Don't ever forgot that, okay?
hugs, eve

untitled.

so, um, hi there. 
i like you. a lot.
i never saw it coming, though, this attraction to you. 
when we met so many months ago,
you were just a stranger to me.
but then, every time i saw your face 
and talked to you, you grew on me. 
somehow you weaved your way 
into my young mind and 
twisted yourself around my heart.
i'm comfortable around you. i'm not afraid
to be silly in front of you, which is
strange and very rare for me. i don't even understand 
why i like you. sure, you are kind, funny, smart, and witty.
but, i guess, i... i just don't know.
g.

hold on

hold on || by eve victorie from ordinaryutopia on 8tracks Radio.

Spring calls out to you. It sends a breeze into your room from the open window. You inhale the fresh, raw scent of newness, of change. You want nothing more than to run outside & enjoy yourself. Just sit on the grass for hours upon hours with a lovely book. Stare at the wonderful blue that is the sky above. But you can't. Schoolwork & assignments are waiting to be finished.

Here's a little something to help you hold on, just a little longer. Summer will be worth it, darling.

hugs, eve

i like living (though sometimes i won't admit it)

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow; but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.” - Agatha Christie

life is a curious thing. it can be absolutely miserable, lovely, filthy, daring, gorgeous, and sad all at the same time.
this week has been hard for many people all over the nation. with the horrifying bombing in boston, and just life being life. it's hard.
sometimes, life just plain sucks. this time, as a nation, is one of those times, and my heart is heavy. but even through all of this, as cliche as this might sound, i know that God has this grand plan for all of our lives, all of us. and every little thing that goes on, good or bad, happens for a reason. we each have a set amount of days before the end, though we don't know what our number may be. and that reason is enough to keep me going, to keep on living and breathing and moving the world. because tomorrow could be my last, and i don't want to look back on my life and think of all of the things i could have done, but what i did do. and i want to see God smile and hear him say to me, "well done, my child. well done." that is my goal, my inspiration for living.
so basically, no matter what happens tomorrow, next week, or next month, just remember to rise up and attack each and every single day with enthusiasm, and forget about how horrible you think the days ahead might be. remember that just to be alive is a grand thing indeed, and all things have a purpose.
g.

big things have small beginnings.

some beginnings start so quietly that you don't even notice they're happening. - gossip girl, S2 EP16

i want you to do something, as a way of remembering. pinpoint moments that seem to stand out to you for no particular reason. it can either be in your life or many lives. you never know when you'll look back, realizing this is the moment when it all started. you never know when you'll think 'i can't believe i didn't know that before.' you never know when you'll look at yourself in the mirror and smile, unable to find anything you don't like. you never know when you'll think 'i'm doing good things.' but i want you to know when you start them.

xx,
jocee.

not all about you

You are special.
You are beautiful.
You are wonderful.
You are smart.
You are worth it.

Are any of those statements familiar? Yes, of course. Society throws them at us every day. They are supposed to 'boost our self-esteem'. Make us feel good about ourselves. And I'm not saying that is necessary a bad thing.

But really, when did we get to the point where society needed to tell us we are beautiful & worth it? The Bible tells us that. Isn't it enough? When did we get so caught up in ourselves? So worried about how pretty we are & how smart & how special?

Maybe it's time to look around more. It's not all about how we feel. Maybe instead of entertaining ourselves all the time, we should look for more opportunities to entertain/serve others. Maybe we shouldn't let our moods guide our actions so much.

Our feelings are not at the center of the universe. Maybe it's time we stop acting like they are.

hugs,
eve

i've fallen for your eyes but they don't know me yet

©

sometimes, when bad things happen, we fall into this ditch of confusion and heartbreak. we don't know what happened or why; we can't conclude if it was our fault or theirs; and we surely are at a loss as to how we can fix things. and once we think we've figured it all out, we realize we're not even close. again and again we go through the painful process of turning the events over in our minds, hoping to see a little light tucked in there to make us feel better; but there isn't one. and we get this drop in our stomachs and a sick feeling that all hope of remedying the situation is lost...and so we give up. we stop trying. we extinguish the little beam of hope inside our hearts.

then all of a sudden, for some odd, unknown reason, it gets better. once again, you start catching them looking at you from across the room. again, they go out of their way to sit by you, to speak to you, to make you laugh and smile. they once again get that beautiful look in their eyes when they're near you. they start to look at you with wonder and awe again. when you laugh, that obnoxious, loud laugh of yours, they just gaze at you with admiration and hold back a giant smile.

but you cant say anything. or, you feel like you can't say anything because you don't want to ruin it. but some days, those days when you feel their eyes burning into your neck...you turn and take in the look on their face, hoping to read their heart, praying that you'll see the wonderment that was there before all the bad stuff happened...you just want to grasp their face in both of your hands and kiss the past away.

xoxo,
candace

the effect of meaningless words

Have you ever thought that maybe all the meaningless words make the meaningful words less loud? Have you ever thought that maybe with all the noise of the unimportant, the things that matter aren't being heard? Have you ever thought that the small talk is taking over?

I'm not opposed to small talk. Of course I'm not. I'm just not very good at it. I don't know why. I honestly don't. I just don't see the point I guess. I see the point from a socially acceptable viewpoint. But I don't see its general point. Does it have a point, other than being friendly? And is small talk actually friendly, or is it just something we do so there isn't silence? Do we feel refreshed or understood after engaging in small talk? Is there a point to all this noise?

Have you ever stood in a room full of chatter and wondered if all the chatter is taking over? If all the insignificant words are taking over? The important words aren't being heard because there's just too much noise? The meaningless words have an effect far from meaningless.

Would we listen more if there was less noise?

x, abby

i am on the alert for the first signs of spring.

henry david thoreau, walden.

we are always afraid of change. afraid of what it will bring, what it will do to us. but what we don't realise is the world always changes. always. we'd probably only fully understand it if there was a time lapse video of all the four seasons. the world is always changing, right before our eyes. we only pay attention once we look back and see how much is different. so this is me making an effort to look closer, to be silent and listen to the birds making new nests and the leaves sprouting on tree branches. happy, happy march to all of you.

xx,

jocee.

{pea ess: the original was accidentally deleted. sorry about that. i fix it.}

sweater weather

“Personally, I like to think my brother is having a college experience like they do in the movies. I don't mean the big fraternity party kind of movie. More like the movie where the guy meets a smart girl who wears a lot of sweaters and drinks cocoa. They talk about books and issues and kiss in the rain. I think something like that would be very good for him, especially if the girl were unconventionally beautiful. They are the best kind of girls, I think. I personally find 'super models' strange. I don't know why this is.” - Perks of Being a Wallflower. 

As a college freshman I'm still pretty new and easily overwhelmed by this whole college experience thing. Incidentally, despite the hullabaloo that is college with it's eminent deadlines and the ruckus of growing up that kind of comes with that I really must say that I'm loving my personal college experience. I always wanted college to be something I acknowledge, I'm surrounded by a lot of students who sort of view it as an in and out thing that they don't really take the time to appreciate where we are in our lives right now. Perhaps I only care so much because I was homeschooled and we homeschoolers tend to be a little more zealous about life and social interactions in general then your A-typical jaded public school attendee.

Either way, I'm excited to be that girl, in the sweaters with her Starbucks loving life even when I have an exam or an English paper looming over my head.

So here's to higher education, big sweaters, caffeine and social interactions. Hoozah!

xx, 

Bleah

the picture on the wall

You know when you hang a new picture on the wall? At first, you glance at it every single time you pass by. Maybe you even smile & stop to admire it. But then after a while, it just seems to sort of blend into the landscape. It becomes 'just' a picture. 'Just' a photo. You pass by it every single day, you see it... but you don't. Not really. It becomes something that's just there.

Until... one day. The day that picture gets taken down. You pass by that place where it used to hang & you immediately notice that something is amiss. You can't quite put your finger on it, but you know something is missing. So you look around & you notice the wall... & it is bare. Where once was colour, a dreamy landscape, a smiling face... there remains now only an echo. A rectangular imprint on the wall where that frame once hung. That square of paint which the sun's rays had never had the chance to brighten... until now.

And in that moment you realize just how much that picture transformed the place where it used to hang. Maybe it was for the better, or maybe for the worse. Maybe you miss it, or maybe you don't. But whatever the case, there is a valuable lesson to be learned from that picture: the little things, however little, matter. Maybe we don't see them, or maybe we like to pretend we don't, or maybe we just never stopped to look... but they do.

Look around. Observe. Admire. Because the little things, so often taken for granted, won't always stick around forever. One day they will take with the current & swim away. Please, don't let that be the day you realize how much they mean to you.

hugs, eve