the letter i never sent him

Dear Sir,

I am this person. I am this young and capable person full of dreams and goals accompanied by the combination of drive and talents necessary to fulfill these goals. Just the same as anyone else I am capable of success, I have no handicaps and I have the skill and the tenacity to be everything that I’ve always wanted to be.

I suppose what I am saying in a poor and round-a-bout way is that I have what it takes, just the same as any other young person, to accomplish amazing and admirable things and there is no reason whatsoever that I shouldn't become some great someone in charge of some great tast to fulfill some great and world changing venture, to be remembered by a great multitude of society without ever having to worry about being forgotten.

Why then, above all of these prospects, is the one most pressing desire of my heart so simply sit in your arms and watch the sunset over the horizon and lay with you as we attempt to make sense of the stars, long into the night until the very same sun rises westward?

Why, about all of these sensible and very prosperous endeavors is one thing that would bring me the greatest joy to make you smile? To learn the rhythm of your voice, to memorize it like my favorite song, obsess over it as if it were my greatest treasure and most prized possession?

Because I love you, and because even under the knowledge that this may only last for one day, or it may very well last for ten thousand days, a solitary moment or an endless amount of moments containing enough memories to fill a library of books – or it may last for some reasonable amount of time that is acceptable and easily predictable for a pair of teenagers.

Either way, no matter how long fate allows this to last and no matter what the outcome may be I will risk it without hesitation. My heart I’ve given to you on a silver platter and now it’s yours to cherish or to break and your whim. I’ve given no thought to the time I must invest in order to give us our very best shot.

You are the one person who right now, in this moment, I want more than anything I’ve ever longed for in my entire life. And if you remember me, my love, then I don’t care who forgets.

Love (I hope so at least),