c'est quoi l'amour?

(source)

This is my favorite time of year because romance and the color pink are all socially acceptable. In honor of Valentines Day I thought I'd share a short love story that I wrote last week with you.

I was sitting next to you in biology, do you remember? We were sitting there while the professor spoke in that broken English that you said could probably lull you to sleep at night, you’d also said jokingly once or twice that the only thing that did keep you awake in biology class was me.

         Now, while I’d like to translate that into some romantic gesture but I know it wasn't  you see I like extra credit so I answer a lot of questions and since you sit next to me and I’m sounding like the guy who at auctions who talks a mile a minute I don’t think you could actually get any sleep. I often wondered how often you regretted picking my table at the beginning of the semester.

       That semester was half-over, do you remember? We’d just been released, early that day I think. You asked if I wanted to get coffee or something because it was cold, and really I wanted cocoa. Except that I said no, I don’t know why I said no my next class wasn't for an hour, but I said not and continued shoving overstuffed binders and folders into my way-to-heavy backpack.

         “Okay well maybe another time?” you said.

       I felt awkward, which isn’t new because I always feel awkward but I felt oddly awkward today which was, well, odd.

        “Yeah sure. Let me give you my number”

       My friend Kim told me later that he probably thought I was being forward and would be attracted to that, but I wasn’t being forward I was being logical. How could we do it another time if he didn’t have my number, when usually I wouldn’t have any time after biology? And what was the likelihood that we would be released early “another time”?

       I recited it to you and you put the ten digits into your phone, area code and all, and then you typed a name for my contact information. I looked over your shoulder and I saw that you put Lizi from biology 1301. Which I thought was funny, like you have any other biology classes, or like you would take any other ones after this, like you would even keep my number pass this semester to get confused with any other Lizi’s from biology class.

      It was in that moment that I realized I didn’t want to be Lizi from biology class, and I wondered what it could possibly change to. Maybe we’d become friends and it would be Lizi Holden, my first and last name like everyone else in your contacts [or so I presumed]. Or maybe we would fall in love and it would be Baby with a heart. Or My Darling. Or The Girlfriend with a kissy emoticon. I think that I’d very much like it to say My Lizi, or That Girl I’m in Love with. I know the latter is kind of lengthy, but I like that it’s lengthy and straightforward at the same time. I like that anytime I would text you or call you if someone looked at your phone they would know without a doubt that I’m not just your Baby, or you Girlfriend, or even that we’re cute and sentimental and you call me Darling like something out of an Edgar Allen Poe piece. No, I’d be that girl you love. I think I’d rather be that then your girlfriend.

      It’s the end of the semester now, and I don’t mean to bother you but we never did get that coffee and I’m not asking you to go to Starbucks with me or even IHOP, I just wanted to know if you still have my number, and if I’m still just Lizi from biology, or if I’m something else. 

I hope everyone has a really lovely day.

xx,
Bleah